Communication Breakdown
Good communication is key to a successful relationship. I can teach you how to improve the communication in your relationship.
Narrative Counselling
Do You Want a Happy, Healthy and Loving Relationship?
Would You Like To:
- Stop arguing with your partner?
- Regain trust in your partner after an affair, without worrying where your partner is going or who he or she is meeting?
- Be able to sit down with your partner and share anything on your mind, without fear of recrimination or reprisal?
- Create the sort of relationship that you want your children to have some day?
Most people want happy, healthy and loving relationships. However relationships are hard work. Stress, financial problems, work and family demands all put pressure on our relationships. We talk less. We argue more. We grow distant from each other. Our sex life diminishes. What once was our great love affair no longer feels fresh or exciting. We begin to look in other places for love, support and appreciation.
All relationships go through difficult times. Many survive these times as couples are able to regrow the love and joy they once felt for each other. Others however do not. Marriages finish. Relationships end. Couples break-up.
If your relationship is in difficulty then it is always a good decision to get help. Relationship counselling will help couples to:
- Avoid repetitive and unnecessary arguments
- Deal with issues of anger, abuse and violence before they destroy the relationship
- Rebuild relationships where one partner has had an affair
- Reduce distance in a relationship, including teaching partners how to really communicate well with each other
- Develop warmth and intimacy in a relationship, including how to rekindle sexual desire and attraction.
I have helped hundreds of couples create happy, healthy and loving relationships. I can help you do the same!
Hello. My name is Alastair Duhs.
In the last 17 years I have helped hundreds of couples achieve happy, healthy and long-lasting relationships. Many of these couples thought that their relationships were doomed to failure. Many had lost hope for positive change.
Whatever the issues you are your partner are facing, I can help you overcome these and create the relationship that you really want to have.
Professional Biography:
In the early 1990’s I graduated with a Master’s Degree in Quantum Physics from Auckland University. I then worked for several years as a Patent Attorney before retraining as a counsellor and psychotherapist. I have worked as an individual and couples counsellor since 1998.
Outside of work I am a keen kayaker, astronomer, chess player, nature lover and triathlete. I have completed Ironman New Zealand 5 times, the most recently being in 2015.
17
Years Helping Clients
4100
Over 4,100 Clients Seen
Issues I Can Help With:
Conflict and Anger
Unhealthy conflict can destroy a relationship. I can teach you effective anger management skills to help you manage conflict in your relationship.
Recovery From An Affair
Unfaithfulness is one of the most hurtful events a relationship can endure. I can help your relationship recover from this difficult situation.
Parenting Issues
Parenting can be difficult. I can help you work through parenting issues so that you are both able to parent (or step-parent) effectively.
Pre-Marriage Counselling
Marriage is a life-long commitment. Pre-marriage counselling can help you prepare for a life of happiness and challenges together.
Separation Counselling
Not all couples will choose to stay together. If you are planning to separate I can help you make this process as easy and amicable as possible.
What Others Say About Me…
“Over the years, I believe that I have seen a total of 7-8 counsellors. Without any shred of exaggeration, my experience with Alastair was by far the best. He was extremely helpful and he really truly did change my situation at the time completely into a positive direction. I have recommended him to many people since. I will never forget what he did for me, and all I need to do is think about him and it renews my faith in people and that they can care and make a difference and things can change.”
Sonya (not her real name)
Why See Alastair?
You Are Ready For Relationship Counselling If:
- You and your partner no longer really talk to each other
- You argue a lot and you don’t know how to stop these arguments
- You had had an affair or you are thinking about having one
- You lack closeness, intimacy or sex in your relationship
- You are thinking of leaving your partner
You Are Not Ready For Relationship Counselling If:
- You want to avoid your relationship problems
- You don’t want to create a happy, healthy and loving relationship
- You don’t want to disclose to your partner that you currently having an affair
Are you ready for help?
The first step to improve your relationship is to either:
- Book a FREE 15 minute phone consultation with me, or
- Book a Relationship Counselling Session.
I will send anyone who books in to see me today a FREE copy of my latest ebook “Five Shortcuts To a Happy, Long-Lasting Relationship” (value $9.99). This ebook contains many useful relationship tips and advice and is not available anywhere else!
Cost
Relationship counselling is an investment. Spending a few hundred dollars now to improve your relationship can save you thousands of dollars in the future if you and your partner separate. More importantly, relationship counselling adds to your enjoyment of life as your relationship improves and you realize the fun, love and laughter you have been missing out on.
I charge $100 per session to help couples improve their relationship. Couples may stay in relationship counselling for anything between 1 and 10-20 sessions. Usually couples see considerable improvements in their relationship in as little as four to eight sessions.
What Others Say (Continued)
Couples counselling has been one of the best experiences we have been through as a couple. I have learned how to control my anger in arguments and I am listening to my partner far more than I have before. We are much closer as a couple and look forward to our future together.
David (not real name)
“Alastair has helped me deal with my relationship separation. He has helped me realise that I do have a meaningful future and he has supported me while I have got my life back together. I cannot thank him enough!”
Martin (not real name)
FAQ:
How Long Does Relationship Counselling Take?
The length of relationship counselling depends on what issues you are facing in your relationship. Most couples make considerable improvement to their relationships in as little as four to eight sessions.
What Is Your Success Rate?
It is difficult to clearly state success rates in relationship counselling as everyone has a different definition of success. Most couples report significant positive changes in their relationship after four to eight counselling sessions.
Relationship counselling has not worked for us previously. Why should this be different?
I am a highly effective relationship counsellor. I have described some of the ways that I am unique above. Sometimes relationship counselling does not work as one or both people are not fully ready for change. If you are unsure if relationship counselling will work, ask yourself if you are ready for change. If you are, I will be able to help you achieve the changes you want to make.
My partner has had an affair. Can you help us?
Recovering from an affair is one of the most difficult challenges a couple can face. Provided both people want to continue the relationship, it is possible. Helping a relationship recover from an affair requires full honesty from both people in the relationship and a commitment to creating conditions in the relationship that would make a future affair very unlikely or impossible. I have helped many couples recover from affairs. Many of these couples have created relationships that are far stronger and enjoyable than their relationship was prior to the affair.
My partner does not want to come to relationship counselling. What should I do?
If your partner does not want to come to relationship counselling, making an appointment with me by yourself will help you clarify your current choices in your relationship and help you decide on the best path for you and your partner.
I am also able to contact your partner (with his or her permission) to discuss relationship counselling. After this initial contact people often realize they can gain considerable benefit from relationship counselling. Very few people who truly want to improve their relationship refuse to come to relationship counselling after this initial contact.
Where Are You Located?
I am located at the Richardson Centre, 431 Lake Road, Takapuna, Auckland. There is plenty of parking available. If you are unable to get to Takapuna I also use Skype to provide online counselling for couples.
When Are Your Available?
I usually hold appointments in usual work hours (8am to 6pm, Monday to Friday). You can check when sessions are available using my online booking system.
What If We Cannot Attend Sessions During Usual Hours?
I can see people outside of usual work hours by negotiation. Please call me on 021 137 0228 or contact me using the form below to negotiate a session time outside of my usual work hours.
Still Have Questions?
Please contact me if you have any questions. I usually respond to questions within 4 hours of receiving them.