-Do you and your partner argue all the time?
-Are you feeling increasingly distant and disconnected from your partner?
-Is the love in your relationship diminishing quickly?
-Is your sex life practically non-existent?
-Have you (or your partner) had an affair?
All relationships go through ups and downs. There will be times you feel tremendously in love with partner-glad of your life choice to be with him or her. And there will be times when you wonder why you started your relationship in the first place.
To build a successful relationship it is important to understand that all relationships take work. Just as a car cannot function without regular maintenance, a good relationships cannot function without effort from both people. We may fall in love with our partner almost effortlessly, but we must work to keep our relationship alive. This is especially so when the demands from our workplace, our children, financial stress and so forth are factored into relationships. It is far to easy to fall out of love. Many of us feel distant from our partner. We stop talking together. We no longer date each other. Our sex life may be diminishing. We wonder if we can regain the spark we once burnt so brightly between us.
My relationship is getting increasingly distant. What should I do?
The first step in improving a relationship is to realise that relationships can change. Factors such as intimacy, trust, communication, fun, laughter and a better a sex life can be regained in a relationship. People can regain the same joy and excitement that they felt in the first stages of a relationship. And as relationships grow, develop and age each partner can develop a stronger and more powerful love towards each other. Life’s turmoils and troubles can strengthen a relationship, not just weaken it.
“Life’s turmoils and troubles can strengthen a relationship, not just weaken it.”
I want my relationship to get better. What should I do?
Almost all relationships that are struggling will benefit from relationship counselling. Relationship counselling provides a safe environment with a trained counsellor or therapist where people can discuss what is really going on for them. This allows both people to share everything from their deepest hurts and frustrations to their most treasured hopes and dreams for their relationship. The act of deep sharing in a room with safe, neutral counsellor often allows people to move on from the areas that they feel stuck in in a relationship and to regain the warmth and love that they are really searching for from their relationship.
“The act of deep sharing in a room with safe, neutral counsellor often allows people to move on from the areas that they feel stuck in in a relationship and to regain the warmth and love that they are really searching for from their relationship.”
In the process of relationship counselling the relationship counsellor may also suggest tools or techniques to improve the quality of the relationship or to resolve common relationship issues. These issues may include:
• dealing with stress,
• anger management issues
• poor communication
• jealousy or insecurity,
• and many other similar problems.
Just as it is difficult to fix a car if one is not a trained mechanic, fixing a relationship can be difficult if it is done without the advice and experience of a trained and professional relationship counsellor.
Relationship counselling has not worked for us previously. Why should this be different?
I have been a trained counsellor and psychotherapist for the last 25 years. In this time I have seen literally hundreds of couples. Many of these people have struggled with complex issues, such as the breakdown of a relationship after an affair, anger management issues, constant arguing and bickering or perhaps even a complete breakdown of the relationship to the extent where both parties barely talk to each other anymore.
Many of the couples who come to see me have been to previous relationship counselling. At times this counselling has been effective. For other couples, relationship counselling has been of little or no benefit. Sometimes this is due to the timing of the relationship counselling-perhaps one person hasn’t been ready to face the issues in the relationship or was not totally committed to the relationship succeeding. Other times, the relationship counsellor may not have been a good fit with the couple. Occasionally the relationship counsellor has simply not been skilled enough at his or her job.
Regardless of the reason pervious relationship counselling has not worked, in the 25 years I have worked as a counsellor I have helped hundreds of couples create happier and healthier relationships with each other.
“In the 25 years I have worked as a counsellor I have helped hundreds of couples create happier and healthier relationships with each other.”
Either myself or my partner has had an affair. Can you help us?
Recovering from an affair is perhaps one of the most difficult challenges a couple can face. Provided both people want to continue the relationship however, it is possible. Helping a relationship recover from an affair usually requires full honesty from both people in the relationship and a commitment to creating conditions in the relationship that would make a future affair very unlikely or impossible. Although it is both time consuming and hard work, I have helped many couples navigate the difficult and often treacherous journey of affair recovery. Many of these people have ended up creating relationships with each other that are far stronger and more robust than their relationship ever was prior to the affair occurring.
My partner does not want to come to relationship counselling. What should I do?
If your partner does not want to come to relationship counselling, you may wish to make an appointment with me to discuss your options in the relationship. This can help you clarify what your current choices are in your relationship and help you decide what the best path for you and your relationship.
I am also able to contact your partner (with his or her permission) to discuss relationship counselling. After this initial contact people often realise that relationship counselling is a place where they can gain significant benefit for themselves and their relationship. I find very few people who truly want to improve their relationship refuse to come to relationship counselling after this initial contact.
My partner and I are wanting to begin relationship counselling. What should we do?
The first step in beginning relationship counselling is to contact me using the contact button below or to use my online booking system to book a relationship counselling session now. I can offer relationship counselling sessions either face to face or via Skype. I look forward to talking with you!